I once had a friend betray. We spent a lot of time together and were quite close. Then a series of events unfolded that caused me to realize that she had been talking badly about me behind my back.

I was confused by the situation. I thought we were friends. Treating your friends in such a way was something I was unaccustomed to and something that I won’t have considered doing. This betrayal made me quite angry. I didn’t want to speak to her or have anything to do with her. I actually spent time thinking about how of bad a person I thought she was.

Then I realized that this friend of mine had problems. I knew she had problems before, but this incident and the way she handled it made me realize that her problems were more serious than I had though.

I have to admit that I held a grudge for a little while. I just couldn’t seem to get over it. I thought about it a lot and how much it bothered me. Then I came to a realization. Yes, what she did hurt my feelings. It was unfair and uncalled for. It made me quite angry, but it made me wonder what her life must be like. If she feels like she has to those kinds of things to people how horrible must her life be? How must she really feel inside?

This is what helped me forgive her. I know I can’t trust her really, and I don’t even spend time with her anymore, but I’m not angry about it anymore either.

When the people around you do horrible things. Don’t waste your time holding a grudge. Get yourself out of harm’s way. Don’t put yourself in a position to be hurt by them again and again. Also, remember that whatever it is that made them do that thing is making their life miserable. You may not see it on the outside but on the inside there is something very wrong. So instead of wasting your time with anger and hate and letting that eat away at your soul, feel pity for that person. Yes, you have a right to be angry, but feel that anger and let it go. Don’t let that fester inside of you eating up your life. Let it go and live.

Photo by circo de invierno ~

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